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Mastering the Art of Negotiation is essential, whether you’re asking for a pay raise, securing a better car deal, or convincing your spouse to take out the trash. Knowing how to negotiate increases your chances of success.
Negotiation might seem like a skill for experts, but there’s a secret to it. Subtle negotiation tactics are easy to learn and can give you ninja skills to improve your relationships, solve problems, and earn the respect of your peers.
Some believe that negotiation is manipulative. However, it’s more about navigating relationships by understanding others and creating a win-win situation where nobody feels compromised.
We picked the best techniques used by expert negotiators. These techniques are easy to learn and can be put into practice immediately.
1. Be Prepared
Know what you want before you start negotiating. Gather information as needed and consider what matters to the other person. They have an agenda, too, and one mistake people often make is to only focus on their needs.
Have a set goal, but have a lesser acceptable target in case the original goal isn’t feasible.
2. Learn Active Listening
At the heart of successful negotiation is the ability to build rapport. That means giving the other person your full attention, clarifying what they say, and asking questions. Make eye contact and smile as appropriate. This makes the other person feel seen and heard.
Once you’ve established trust and rapport, it becomes easier to negotiate.
3. Use Silence Strategically
We’re so used to filling the gaps in conversation as if something terrible will happen if we lapse into silence. Silence is a powerful negotiation tactic because we are uncomfortable with the “empty space.” One minute of silence can feel like hours, so hold your nerve.
When you present your terms, such as “I’d like a 10% discount on this car deal, please,” be quiet and wait.
4. Frame the Negotiation to Suit Both Parties
Being a ninja negotiator doesn’t mean you overpower the other person with your skills, aiming to get what you want above all things. It’s essential to frame a negotiation so both parties feel they got something positive.
For example, if you ask your boss for a 10% raise, offer something in return, such as training new staff or taking on some of your boss’s menial tasks.
5. Be Patient
It’s natural to feel impatient or frustrated if negotiations aren’t moving as fast as you would like. Hold your nerve. The aim is to reach a mutually favorable conclusion, which can be time-consuming, considering other people’s goals and desires. If you show impatience, it diminishes the trust you built when first establishing rapport.
6. Negotiate in Person
It’s challenging to negotiate successfully in any format other than face-to-face. We subconsciously read another person’s body language and react to tiny micro-expressions, which helps to build a personal connection.
When two people are in rapport, an outsider will observe body language mirroring. That is impossible to reproduce digitally. If you have the choice, always opt for in-person negotiations.
7. Practice Mirroring
Mirroring is a neuro-linguistic programming (NLP) technique that teaches us to mirror another person’s body language. However, this tactic needs to be subtle, or it can feel disingenuous. For example, if you are standing facing the other person, observe the direction of their feet. If they face you, well done. You have rapport.
If their feet turn away from you, they want to leave. Leave a minute or two before you mirror the other person’s movements.
8. Use Anchoring
Anchoring is a powerful psychological technique when negotiating prices because it creates context. For example, if you want to sell your car for $5,000, start with $5,500 or even $6k. If a potential buyer hesitates over the price, you can negotiate, knowing it will still be a win-win for both parties.
If the buyer gets your car for $5,000, they’re happy because they saved $1,000.
9. Master the Art of Compromise
A flexible approach to negotiations can achieve better outcomes. Before you begin, have the non-negotiables clear in your mind and be willing to compromise on everything else.
Remember that the other person may have non-negotiables, which can cause a sticking point if you cannot compromise on some objectives.
10. Stay Emotionally Detached
Remain detached throughout negotiations. Becoming emotional can heighten your impulsive responses, causing a lapse in judgment. Stay focused on your objectives and stick to the facts.
Even if you try to stifle your emotions, the other person will pick up subconscious body language of irritation, frustration, or impatience, which could fracture the negotiation.
11. Know When to Walk Away
If negotiations reach a point where both parties start looping around in circles with no progress, it may be time to walk away. The negotiation is over if the other party is unwilling to compromise, becomes emotional, or behaves unreasonably.
From that point, it stops being a negotiation and becomes a power game based on who will “win.”
12. Create a Sense of Urgency
Creating a sense of urgency can cause FOMO (fear of missing out) in the other person, particularly if they have invested time and energy negotiating with you. For example, if you offer a discount on a product, you could say it is only available for 24 hours.
Use this negotiation tactic sparingly because it can pressure the other person, disrupting the rapport.
13. Leverage Social Proof
Social proof is powerful because it builds trust and encourages others to make buying decisions. Companies use testimonials and case studies to promote their products and services. It works.
Gather as much social proof as possible before negotiating and make it available to the other party. You can discuss examples that relate to the other person’s situation.
14. Emphasize Long-Term Relationships
Long-term relationship building will always trump short-term sales. Pressuring a person for a quick sale may get you the deal that day, but that person is unlikely to buy from you again. You compromised the trust. They may have felt pressured and bought against their better judgment. It’s better to build a reputation as someone people can trust.
15. Seek Win-Win Solutions
The worst-case scenario for negotiation is when one person walks away feeling that they “lost.” The objective of a successful negotiation is to create win-win situations where everyone involved feels they got something positive from the deal.
Both parties should benefit and walk away, happy to continue the relationship. Seek opportunities where a win-win is possible.
16. Leverage Scarcity
People want something they think they cannot have. This is a scarcity bias that can encourage people to make quicker decisions. For example, if you sell a product, you could say there are only five in stock, and new stock won’t arrive for three months.
We see this tactic online with “scarcity marketing,” but it can feel a bit sleazy if overused. Use it sparingly.
17. Practice Persuasive Communication
There’s a difference between persuasion and manipulation; the line should never cross. Use effective communication techniques to build rapport, such as storytelling, sharing data, and using logic to support your position. Listen, respond appropriately, and allow the other party to share their stories and opinions.
Persuasive communication is an art with a foundation for building rapport.
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